Krishna Janamashtami:)

“At least not today” I muttered under my breath to my friend Pinky as she ordered a fish thali for lunch.
“Why, what is today?” Soni asked me lazily across the table.
“Janmashtami” Pinky and I chorused. She looked at me, I wonder if I saw a little bit of guilt on Pinky's face. The scene is, Pinky comes from a Brahmin family, from Mangalore, for those who don’t know what that means, lets just say-the best of all the cascading events that will occur if her folks find out she’s been eating non veg is that she’ll been disowned.
“Big deal man”, she justified, trying to convince her self more than us, “I’ll go have a bath before the puja.”
Soni added, before she smiled at me, “Anyway Krishna was a non vegetarian himself, so its not as bad” Making a mental to verify this new bit of information I looked at Pinky as she relished on her fried fish, cooked in mustard oil, garnished with spices, as though the creature was just meant to meet this end.
“Better eat fast or we’ll be late for the puja” Pinky punctuated in the midst of her chewing, “amma wont like it if we’re late”

Pinky’s mum had invited us for puja, not that they do it on a grand scale, the puja prasadams was too good a deal for me to resist. So we accepted. As promised, as soon as Pinky reached home, she took a bath, in her mind she had compensated and paid penalty for eating non veg by the bath, while the fish probably not even had digested fully. She changed into a salwar kameez and her mum dressed in a pink saree, the attire saved for days like these.

The last janmashtami that I celebrated was two years ago when my folks were in the city, my mum was working on janmashtami day too (yes, the pits of working for an international school), she came back around five, clad in a loose Fab India short Kurti and my dad’s old jeans, altered about five inches waist and length.

Quick as she could, she washed up and draped the red Pattu saree, the one with the golden border… ah… she looks wonderful in that one. Next, she targeted the kitchen, made the batter for Nai Appams and while waiting for it to ferment, she mixed the Kollam powder in right proportions with water and the Kollam was drawn-from the entrance to the puja room the design being the foot steps (padam- a simple 8 structure with toes) of baby Krishna-a ritual going back to ammu-patti times.

I remember watching her prepare for the puja, single handedly, whilst I was plunked in front of the computer drooling over the FRIENDS star cast, turning a blind eye to every attempt by my mum to entice me into helping her, to draw the Kollam or make appams, and a deaf year to the stridently loud shlokas she played. We were both used to it, its’ our ritual.

Finally the appams were made, the time of completion coincided perfectly with my dad’s grand entry, the weariness of his long day of work having been drowned away in a refreshing bath, the actual aarti started, and then the navediam (offering the prasadams-the appams in this case-to God first) After the navediam and namaskarams we were permitted to dig into the nai appams, and my sister to break her fast. We sat, as a custom after every puja, around the dining table and talked- about office, school, college, this and that and munched on the amazing prasadams.

I painfully dragged myself into the present and left the Nai Appams behind as aunty called for us puja. Maybe it was because I had not seen a puja at home in so long or because of the phase I’m going through or the Shantaram-Shankaran effect, or the Beatles, but suddenly the entire “puja” concept seemed so beautiful, filled with love and purity, with devotion, innocence, with bonding. Pinky’s dad started the puja, reciting Sanskrit shlokas written in the Kanada script, loud and clear he read them, the puja essentials gleaming in the light of the lamps. There’s something about the light from the lamps, the valak, it makes the surrounding look fresh and new… the flowers-the jasmine garland, the fruits, banana, apple, pears, the milk, the water, the betel leaves, the tulsi(basil), the small silver containers filled with red vermillion and haldi(turmeric powder), the rice colored red with kumkum which will later be showered on the idol…there’s some significance in each of these items, I thought, a significance and reason lost somewhere during evolution. Now it’s just a ritual, I thought-no one knows why we do it.

The Aarti essentials
As uncle proceeded with the puja, aunty prepared for the aarti, the camphor, and the incense sticks in the right place and Pinky’s sister with the bell. The aarti, it makes you feel so many things at the same time, just if you let it, the sound of the bell ringing, then smell of the aggarbatti, the lit camphor moving, its yellow light leaving its trail due to the momentum combined with gravity, giving it a lazy look, it is like two minutes of settlement.
The essentials of the puja
Once done with the aarti, Pinky’s sister started singing, classical songs, as the entire family joined in, smiling and enjoying themselves; filling in unknown words with aalaps and “mmmmmmmmmm…”, tunes ranging from ISKON’S Hare Rama Hare Krishna to Payo ji Maine to Krishna ne begane baro. I was overwhelmed. Aunty concluded with a shloka-krishnaaya vasudevaya… as everyone looked on, and somewhere it struck me, I chorused –
Krishnaaya Vasudevaya Devaki Nandanaayacha
NandaGopa Kumaaraya Govindaaya Namo Namaha.

I was filled with emotion. I had just realized the reason behind Amma’s constant teaching me these shlokas. It’s a quest, to find out the meaning, to decipher it and connect with it. An omen if one may say. I was filled with gratitude towards my folks who tried to keep it alive within me. I’ve said it before, and I quote again-the eyes will see only what the mind can comprehend.

Sometimes we learn stuff without any reasons, sometimes we find no need for reasons and sometimes the reasons presents itself in due course, however it goes, as long as the deed spreads love and makes one feel good, it becomes abstract.

As aunty filled our plates with the numerous prasadams she had made, I asked Pinky, making sure we were safely earshot from her mother, “you know, there’s this new restaurant opened at koramangala, they specialize in coastal cuisine, prawns and crabs, wanna go? My treat…” we both smiled.